BIGGS & BAILEY FILM REVIEWS

Get the verdict on the latest films from our resident film critics Biggs and Bailey.

Bailey: On general release this month is Inspector Gadget.

Biggs : Inspector Garbage more like.

Bailey : This incredibly powerful movie looks at the conflict between man and machine culminating in the central character, exquisitely played by Matthew Broderick, adopting and incorporating the features of ever potent technology to become a kind of chimera: a half man, half-machine monstrosity.

Biggs : What the hell are you talking about? This film’s a comedy based on a children’s cartoon series.

Bailey : One cannot overlook the metaphorical representations in this artistic endeavour.

Biggs: You’re so full of crap.

Bailey: And you’re a Philistine who has no appreciation for the….

Biggs: Put a sock in it! At least I don’t look like the backside of donkey.

Bailey: How dare you! I’m here to review a film and you insult me.

Biggs : More like accurately describe your appearance.

Bailey: You’re immaturity is quite astounding!

Biggs : As is your B.O. I didn’t want to work with a guy who’s so up himself that his head is in his ass.

Bailey: That’s it. I’m going. I’ve never had to work with such a puerile idiot.

Biggs : Oh go suck on your mamma’s…... (That’s more than enough….Editor)

Next week Biggs and Bailey will attempt to review another film without disembowelling each other.

Headlines Dear Barbara Problem Page

Question of the month E-mail us